Christmas Monologue 2

Last year you guys heard me moaning and groaning about being a “Special Needs” gifter – how much I hate to shop, how I can never find the right gift for the right person. Well, I looked online and found the solution:

(Direct Quote) “FREE VIRTUAL CYBER ELECTRONIC CHRISTMAS GIFTS YOU CAN SEND ON-LINE! Send Virtual Fun Gifts – Fast – Free – No Check Out Lines! Remember It’s The Thought That Counts! Select Category and Press “Go”:

Send Virtual Candy
Send Virtual Chocolate
Send Virtual Holiday Flowers
Send a Virtual Horse
Send Virtual Money!”

You can also send holiday gifts from Facebook. (Direct Quote) “Send free gifts to all your Facebook friends. There are gifts for lots of holidays including some you may not have heard of. These gifts are all virtual, but that doesn’t make them any less cool to get.” I can see the wheels turning for some of you Facebook junkies. Like, do they have gifts for Bosses’ Day?

I just started getting into Facebook this year, I have about 108 “friends.” They include relatives from Alabama, grade school friends from Louisiana, college friends from the East Coast, one opposing counsel . . . even some of you. It’s quite the collection. Some of my Facebook friends are good buddies, people I could go have a beer with. Some of them I would never have a beer with in a million years. Because they are 9 years old.

It blows my mind, the way you can channel surf your Facebook Friends:

• Kate L_____ is loving the cool weather that blew through last night.

• Shala C_____ thinks you have got to be kidding her.

• Sally S_____ is in labor.

• Gloria S_____ voted "No" in the President Obama says that they will have a Holiday Tree this year instead of a Christmas Tree.

• Skee S_____ (my one opposing counsel) says there is a Texas Hold Em' Tournament with beer pong tournament to follow, $40 buy in gets you in plus all the FREE food and drink (beer included) you can consume. . .

• Linda E_____ just completed level 2 of Artichokes mastery in FarmVille!

• Adam H______can’t say it enough, “I LOVE MY WIFE!!!” =) 9 people liked that comment, 8 of whom were women

Sometimes we imagine God up in heaven, surfing his Facebook account, except he has about 6 billion friends. And we’re all down here, posting crazy stuff on our status and trying to get God to click the “like” button.

But Christmas showed us God is not like that. I’m speaking from my faith tradition, obviously. But the whole point of Christmas is that God left Heaven and Came Down, as a baby. There’s nothing less virtual than a baby, especially one with a dirty diaper. God is not a Facebook friend, he didn’t give us a free cyber electronic gift. He gave us himself.

This has been a tough year for many of us, and for the firm. The tendency is to disengage from each other, to remain “virtual” friends. You can ask my legal assistant, I’m definitely guilty of this. When things get busy I shut my door and start spamming her with e-mails. So I wanted to thank each of you for the times that you have given of yourselves in 2009. My hope for the New Year is that we can remember to be a real-life support for each other, for the good of our clients that depend on us.

I’d like to close with the annual shopping tip for all your Special Needs Gifters: Virtual Eggnog. I hear it has 0 carbs.

L.T.L.